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| Posted by Jenks on 07-Aug-2005 | Why did the condom fly across the room?...Why did the condom fly across the room?
- It got pissed off.
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6 people have rated this joke: |
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| Posted by bugzaboo on 09-Aug-2005 | daughter needs a prom dressOne day a daughter went to her father and asked for a prom dress. The father said, "if you give me a blowjob I will bye you the prettiest dress in the store!" She said "your gross dad" and went on her way. Two weeks before the prom she again asked her father for the dress, he replied "you know what to do, if you give me a blowjob, you will get the dress!" She again replied "your sick dad" and went on her way. Three days before the prom she again asked her dad for the dress, he again said "you know what to do to get the dress" except this time she agreed! After she got through giving him a blowjob she said "damn dad, your dick taste like shit!" He said " I know, your brother needed to barrow the car!
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6 people have rated this joke: |
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| Posted by ayo ogunseinde on 07-Aug-2005 | What's the difference between a "Ritz" cracker...What's the difference between a "Ritz" cracker and a lesbian?
- One is a snack cracker, and the other is a crack snacker.
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5 people have rated this joke: |
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| Posted by Megan S. Renner on 09-Aug-2005 | Spanish dining
An American tourist goes into a restaurant in Spain and orders the specialty of the house. When his dinner arrives, he asks the waiter what it is.
"These, senor," replied the waiter in broken English, "are the cojones, how you say, the testicles, of the bull killed in the ring today."
The tourist swallowed hard but tasted the dish and thought it was delicious. So he comes back the next evening and orders the same item. When it is served, he says to the waiter, "These cojones, or whatever you call them...are much smaller than the ones I had last night."
"Yes, senor," replied the waiter, "You see...the bull, he does not always lose.
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2 people have rated this joke: |
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| Posted by LeaveMeBe on 07-Aug-2005 | What's the difference between 200 blow jobs...What's the difference between 200 blow jobs and a blimp?
- One's a good year and one's a great year!
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5 people have rated this joke: |
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| Posted by Robert L. Gianferante on 09-Aug-2005 | The Leprechaun Of ThA little boy went to the bathroom at school, but when he went to wipe his bum, there was no toilet paper so he used his hands. When he got back to class, his teacher asked him what he had in his hands.
"A little leprechaun and if I open my hand he'll get scared away," the boy said. He was then sent to the principal's office and the principal asked him what he had in his hands.
"A little leprechaun and if I open my hands he'll get scared away."
He was sent home and his mom asked him what he had in his hands.
"A little leprechaun and if I open my hands he'll get scared away."
He was sent to his room and his dad came in and asked him what he had in his hands.
"A little leprechaun and if I open my hands he'll get scared away."
Then his Dad got really mad and yelled, "Open your hands!" "Look, Dad. You scared the crap out of him."
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5 people have rated this joke: |
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| Posted by Rob E. Daynes on 12-Aug-2005 | Lisp GuyOne day, a guy that had a lisp decided to walk down the street. His name was Harry!
He walks into the bakery, looks around and says to the lady behind the counter "Can I please have that bum!" the lady behind the counters says "You mean bun!" Harry replies "Yeh!" he gets his bun and then walks into the Hardware shop next door. he has a look around and gets something then walks up to the counter and says "Can I please buy this fuck it!" the shopkeeper replies "You mean bucket!" Harry answers "Yeh!" he gets his bucket and then walks down the street a bit more.
He gets to the petshop and sees a dog left by itself in the window. He feels sorry for it so he walks up to the counter in the pet shop and says "Can I please have that cock and spank it!" the shopkeeper replies" You mean cocker spaniel!" Harry answers "Yeh!"He gets the cocker spaniel and is walking home when he drops his bun and bucket. An old women walked past him so he said to her "Can you please hold my cock and spank it while I get my bum and fuck it!!!"
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9 people have rated this joke: |
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| Posted by Beau B. Churchill on 07-Aug-2005 | Why is giving a Blow Job a win/lose sitiuation?...Why is giving a Blow Job a win/lose sitiuation?
He may have you at his knees, but you have him by the balls.
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5 people have rated this joke: |
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