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| Posted by Paula L. Forza on 10-Aug-2005 | AstrologyQ: Why has astrology been invented?
A: So that economy could be an accurate science.
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| Posted by slut j/k on 14-Aug-2005 | Swing set .v.s. ManWhat does a swing set and a man have in common?
They both cum really hard......
...............................
..............................
......to asemble!!
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| Posted by Kyle W. Battalia on 10-Aug-2005 | Sense of humorQ: What's an actuary?
A: An accountant without the sense of humor.
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| Posted by Clifton S. Barnes on 10-Aug-2005 | Light bulbQ: How many marxists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None - the bulb contains within it the seeds of its own revolution.
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| Posted by Barry B on 14-Aug-2005 | The Chinese Tourist Once there was a chinese guy that never knew english and went
to visited New York, and saw the statue of liberty,
so then he asked the person beside him "who built this
thing?"(in chinese)and the person said "what do you mean?'
"oh, whach yu min , that means he must be chinese"(in
chinese).So then he went on and saw the bridge.Then he
asked a lady "who built this bridge"(in chinese)then the lady
said"what do you mean" "oooooooooh, i want to meet
this man,(in chinese)So then he was smiling alot, and walking
and all of the people were staring at him, So then he
bumped into a funeral and asked "who's in that that cofin?the
the man said "what do you mean" " oh no, whach yu min
is dead!, and then he went crying back to china.
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| Posted by chrissy on 10-Aug-2005 | ColonelQ: What do you call a Soldier who can read and write?
A: Colonel
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| Posted by Moelicious on 14-Aug-2005 | Dilbert Reviews Star Wars: Episode IHello, readers, of course, it is I, Dilbert. The one and only. And I have
a review of a movie for you, which technically isn't a movie to me, since
I found 6,765 technical errors, and the maximum to qualify as a movie is
6,764.
All right, let's talk about this "movie."
It was called SWEP1TPM. I am now speaking in the Engineer code.
The movie wasn't GAA. I found many TEs. I could easily tell that the SEs
were F. How can anyone like this movie? The plot was OK, but the plot
doesn't matter in a movie. It's all about the LATC.
DYUWIS?
I give this M 0 Ss.
(there was a lot more in, but we cut 99.99754% out because it would C your
COM)
Translations:
SEWP1TPM = Star Wars: Episode 1, The Phantom Menace
GAA: Good At All
TE: Technical Error
SE: Special Effect
DYUWIS: Do you understand what I'm saying?
M = Movie
S = Star
C = crash
COM = computer
(original size was = 3.7MB)
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| Posted by Kasey Matthews on 10-Aug-2005 | Giving sad news to a troopThe Captain called the Sergeant in. "Sarge, I just got a telegram that Private
Jones' mother died yesterday. Better go tell him and send him in to see me."
So the Sergeant calls for his morning formation and lines up all the troops.
"Listen up, men," says the Sergeant. "Johnson, report to the mess hall for KP.
Smith, report to Personnel to sign some papers. The rest of you men report to
the Motor Pool for maintenance. Oh by the way, Jones, your mother died, report
to the commander."
Later that day the Captain called the Sergeant into his office. "Hey, Sarge,
that was a pretty cold way to inform Jones his mother died. Couldn't you be a
bit more tactful, next time?"
"Yes, sir," answered the Sarge.
A few months later, the Captain called the Sergeant in again with, "Sarge, I
just got a telegram that Private McGrath's mother died. You'd better go tell him
and send him in to see me. This time be more tactful."
So the Sergeant calls for his morning formation. "Ok, men, fall in and listen
up." "Everybody with a mother, take two steps forward." "Not so fast, McGrath!"
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| Posted by Roy A. Pitta on 14-Aug-2005 | fire in the buildingthere was a fire in a shoe factory...one hundred soles were lost
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| Posted by Dazza on 14-Aug-2005 | chemistryWhat is the difference between a chemical engineer and a chemist?
about $20,000 per year
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