Animal Jokes

Animals however benign they may be have fallen victim to many a jokes since time immemorial. And here at www.Funny-Jokes-Portal.com, we have a collection of some of the best ever among over 60,000 individual entries grouped into over 90 categories including the one regarding Animal Jokes. www.Funny-Jokes-Portal.com is the premier source for all the latest and best Animal Jokes that can be found on the internet to date. Our vast collection of jokes is considered to be the most extensive and it tackles every imaginable topic out there.

From insects to our furry companions, we have jokes for all of them including some from the wild. These Animal Jokes gives these denizens of the wild or the not so wild a twist of humor that allows us to view them differently. But be warned, animals do exhibit strange behavior from time to time, like the cat who loved to watch mice but hated geckos and cockroaches. These and many more Animal Jokes from the many animal lovers out there are sent into our site and are included in our ever expanding collection of jokes making it the most dynamic jokes site on the internet to date. Visit us for a sample of jus what we have in store for your funny bone. www.Funny-Jokes-Portal.com the best source of the hottest jokes over the internet. www.Funny-Jokes-Portal.com where all the best jokes are and are enjoyed.

Animal Jokes

A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We don't serve ducks here." The duck says, “That's okay, I just want a drink."

A polar bear wanders into a bar and say's "I'll have a gin......and tonic." The bartender approaches as he hands over the drink and asks, "Why the long pause between the words?" the bear replies," Don't know, I've always had them."

Why to elephants hate to play cards in the jungle? There were too many cheetahs!

What do you get when you cross a snake and a porcupine? Three meters of barbed wire.

What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo? Big holes all over Australia.

I, like most pet-owners, tend to be a bit protective of my pets like many pet-lovers out there. Puppies are known to eat everything and anything that can fit into their mouth and mine was no exception. One day though I saw him swallow a coin which drew the line and ticked on my panic button getting me to dial the emergency room of the local veterinary hospital near our place. On the other line, a veterinary doctor spoke with me in a calm voice and said that puppies eat coins as well as everything they can fit into their mouth and that I shouldn't be worried much for it would pass harmlessly through the digestive tract in a day or so. He assured me that nothing is going to happen to the pup as he gave me his home number so I could contact him if there is any problem. Then he say's, " If he should ever eat a coin again but a can of PEPSI shoots out of the rear end. Be sure to give me a call so I could see him immediately."

“Now that's something I oughtta see!!!"

Name By Category Rating
the Bear and the Rabbit NINER Animal Jokes 10.0
I'd Die for You... Bob John Animal Jokes 10.0
the Brown and White Cows! Jordan L. Lee Animal Jokes 10.0
the Parrot Joe Skager Animal Jokes 9.00
Monkeys M C 0 4 Animal Jokes 7.00
Shark!!! Mr Leafy Animal Jokes 6.00
Door To Door Evangelism Chris R. Marshall Animal Jokes 6.00
Skydiving cory Animal Jokes 5.00
What Do You Call Jessica Winston?... nick g Animal Jokes 5.00
Car Problems Lindy Meyer Animal Jokes 3.00
IM GOING Herman Animal Jokes 3.00
the Monkey and the Fridge Jes_Sandra_Ash_Bill Animal Jokes 1.50
the English Cat and the French Cat Gothic Bitch Animal Jokes 1.00
Birds Mark B. Cullen Animal Jokes ---
the Dum Fish Cow Man Animal Jokes ---
Wrong Straw Anashel k. Hall Animal Jokes ---
Very Funny Joke Dylan W. Maloney Animal Jokes ---
Stupide Ass John Smith Animal Jokes ---
Dog With No Nose. Krazy Kin Kid Animal Jokes ---
Jim Stephen W. Gradwell Animal Jokes ---
Animals Michael Pothitos Animal Jokes ---
Unique Rabbit Giselle DaSilva-Martins Animal Jokes ---
Hamburger Cow Canadian seven seven eight Animal Jokes ---
Angry Piggy in the Orchard Betsy Animal Jokes ---
Dogs Eric Skinner Animal Jokes ---
Raindeer Lexi M. Johnson Animal Jokes ---
3 Penguins Nina! Animal Jokes ---
Intimate Bunnys David J. Nicholson Animal Jokes ---
the Beach david m. stwert Animal Jokes ---
the Chicken Erin Lord Animal Jokes ---
the Mule Rob Animal Jokes ---
Centepiede Matt Der Animal Jokes ---
3 Pigs Tiger_Lily Animal Jokes ---
Insectiside ron k. carmichael Animal Jokes ---
A Mouse's Vacation Dean A. Evans Animal Jokes ---
Gorillas B B Animal Jokes ---
Ducks At the Bar Ramon Hughes Animal Jokes ---
Animals and Porsche Yo Momma Animal Jokes ---
the Bad Parrot Notum Animal Jokes ---
Mary's Little Lamb Mickey Kirksey Animal Jokes ---
Whale Hijinx Frank J. James Animal Jokes ---
A Day in the Jungle Aaron D. Fredrick Animal Jokes ---
Jesus Zak Animal Jokes ---
Major Misunderstanding jake hatesworth Animal Jokes ---
Christmas Parrott candy gram Animal Jokes ---
Puddles? Brian G. Hurley Animal Jokes ---
the Horse in the Bar Ryan I. Mehmi Animal Jokes ---
Chet the Bird Box Social Animal Jokes ---
Dead Cat lil'devil Animal Jokes ---
Panda in Pub Keith Mc Laughlin Animal Jokes ---