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| Posted by jesse d. stojan on 14-Aug-2005 | Lorena Bobbit in Car AccidentDid you hear? Lorena Bobbit was killed in a car accident.
Some dick cut her off!
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| Posted by Samantha L. Jones on 14-Aug-2005 | John Bobbit's DickLorraina Bobbit was really very upset at the actions of her
husband so she cut off his penis. Below is the part of the story
that you may not have heard yet....
After she cut his dick off, she left the house with his cock in
hand. She got in her car and headed down the highway. Realizing
what she had done, and realizing that she still had the swollen
bloody cock of her husband in her hand, she tossed it out the
window.
The penis flew out and was taken by the wind. It hit the
windshield of the truck that was behind her. Inside the truck,
there were two rednecks that were in from a hunting trip. As the
cock hit the window one turns to the other and says, "Hey Billy
Ray..." "What Cletus?" "You see the size o' the dick on that
bug?"
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| Posted by Jay Macdonald on 14-Aug-2005 | Princess Diana's DandruffHow do you know Princess Diana didn't have dandruff?
They found "Head and Shoulders" on the wind shield.
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| Posted by shadowarrior shadow on 14-Aug-2005 | Jesus is WatchingOne night a Burglar breaks into a house, he's looking around for
something good to steal when in a faint voice he hear's, "Jesus
is watching you." It startled him and he looked around to see if
someone was there, he didn't see anyone. He stumbled across a
stereo that looked pretty nice, and while shoving it into his
bag he hear's again, "Jesus is watching you." He looks to the
other side of the room and sees a parrot, he walked up to him
and say's "Was that you?" The parrot responded, "Yes". He
asked, "And what's your name?" the parrot said "Moses".
"Moses!?" "What kind of an idiot name's his parrot Moses!?" The
parrot said "I don't know! maybe the same idiot that named his
Rottweiler Jesus!"
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| Posted by Richard A. Calden on 14-Aug-2005 | I Cheated to Get to HeavenThree men die at the same time and are standing at the pearly
white gates. St. Peter says "Guys, I never thought I'd say this,
but, Hell's getting too full. So, you were headed to Hell, but
we'll let you into Heaven if you can undertake a painful
situation for 10 years.
The first guy says, "I don't really want to go to Hell. How
about if you light my right hand on fire?" So the guy's hand is
lit on fire and he runs off screaming.
The second guy says, "I suppose I can take something lit on
fire. How about you light my left foot on fire?" So his left
foot is lit on fire, and he runs off screaming.
The third guy says "Aww, I can do better than that! Light my
penis on fire!"
St. Peter asks, "Are you sure you really want to undergo that?"
The man says, "Sure, I'll prove why I deserve to be in Heaven!"
So his penis is lit on fire and he goes running off screaming.
10 years later, after much running and screaming, St. Peter
gathers them all up and extinguishes their flames.
"Congratulations. You have all proven yourselves worthy of
Heaven." The three men all sit down to a golden table as
beautiful angels bring them beer after beer.
The first guy leans over the table and says, "My name's Abe
Johnson, and I lied to get in here. I lost my right hand in
WWII, and this is just a prosthetic attachment."
The second guy says, "Yeah, I know how you feel. My name's Kurt
Johnson, and I lost my left foot in 'Nam."
The third guy leans over and says, "Pleased to meet you guys. My
name's John Bobbit."
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