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| Posted by Tom Lynn on 12-Aug-2005 | Sercomesize A redneckQ: How do you srecomesize A redneck ?
A: Kick his sister in the chin!
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| Posted by Kim L. Moerschbacher on 12-Aug-2005 | ArkansasWhat do you get when 23 Arkansas women are in one room?
A full set of teeth!
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| Posted by brneyedbabe04 on 13-Aug-2005 | Poopygirlpoop stinks
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| Posted by Screamin Falcon on 13-Aug-2005 | That's SickA good ol' boy walked over to a good looking girl in a bar and said "Howdy! How'd y'all liie to come on over to my house and we can have a real good time?"
"I'm not too sure," she replied, "where exactly are you from?"
"I'm from Kentucky, way up in the hills."
"Oh, I've heard about you guys from Kentucky," she said, "you guys will screw pigs and goats and cows and chickens..."
He replied in a very indignant tone, "CHICKENS?!"
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| Posted by Mike Richards on 14-Aug-2005 | safe sex for redneckswhat is a rednecks idea of safe sex?
A padded head board.
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| Posted by kyle robert on 13-Aug-2005 | Poopy poop poohow do you know if you know if your best
friend is jo!!!!!!!!
when you walk out the door of your traler
and he is there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
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| Posted by Prankster (Jake) on 14-Aug-2005 | You Know You're a Redneck When...You know when you're a redneck when...
When you mow the lawn, you find three cars.
Your wind chimes are made from empty beer cans.
Your grandma shouts, "Now, Y'all better come and look at this
before I flush this!"
You say, "We have a washing machine, but I don't think it works
very well. I put in a load of clothes, pulled the chain, and
never saw the clothes again."
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| Posted by Jerica E. Faglie on 14-Aug-2005 | YOU KNOW YOU'RE A REDNECK WHEN:You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.
You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph.
Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
You come back from the dump with more than you took.
You think a subdivision is part of a math problem.
You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.
You have a rag for a gas cap.
Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
You sit on your roof at Christmas time hoping to fill your deer
quota.
You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Cool
Whip.
You use your ironing board as a buffet table.
A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of
improvement.
You missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.
You can yell to your mom, "Hey, Aunt Betty!"
The UFO hotline limits you to one call per day.
You have ever been accused of lying through your tooth.
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| Posted by Doggy on 10-Aug-2005 | You might be a redneck if... kkkYou've ever been kicked out of the KKK for being a "bigot”.
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| Posted by Angel2 on 10-Aug-2005 | Bubba & EarlTwo rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of
bottles of Bud.
Bubba says, "Looked that up ahead, Earl, it's a poll-ice roadblock!! We're
going to get busted far drinking' these here beers!!"
"Don't worry, Bubba", Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinking'
these beers, peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, and throw the
bottles under the seat."
"What far?" asked Bubba.
"Just let me do the talking' Okay?" said Earl.
Well, they finished their beers, threw the empty bottles under the seat, and
each put a label on their forehead.
When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff said, "You boys been drinking'?"
"No, sir”, said Earl. "Web’s on the patch!"
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