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| Posted by SongBird5685 on 14-Aug-2005 | One Wish EachThere were once two red heads and one blonde stuck at the edge
of a cliff. At the tip there was a genie's bottle. The genie
said he would grant them one wish each.
The first red head jumped off and said I wish I was a bird than
flew away. The next red head said I wish I was a bee then flew
away. When the clumsy blonde went to jump off before she went
she said "I wish I was a..." then she tripped and said "Shit!"
And she turned into a piece of poop.
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| Posted by Andy Duraaaaaaaaaaaan on 14-Aug-2005 | What's the DifferenceWhat's the difference between a brunette and a blonde?
It takes about two hours before the blonde gets the joke.
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| Posted by Kim L. Moerschbacher on 07-Aug-2005 | Famous blonde inventions:...Famous blonde inventions:
- Solar powered flashlight.
- Wooden B.B.Q.
- "Clear" liquid paper.
- Glow in the dark sun glasses.
- Water resitant towel.
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| Posted by Hididoe on 08-Aug-2005 | Computer use of a blonde!How can you tell if a blonde has been using a computer?
The joystick is wet and theres white out on the screen!
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| Posted by Matt walsh on 08-Aug-2005 | The Blonde NunOne night a Blond Nun was praying in her room when God appeared before her.
"My daughter, you have pleased me greatly. Your heart is full of love for your fellow creatures and your actions and prayers are always for the benefit of others. I have come to you, not only to thank and commend you, but to grant you anything you wish."
"Dear Heavenly Father, I am perfectly happy. I am a bride of Christ. I am doing what I love. I lack for nothing material since the Church supports me. I am content in all ways."
"There must be something you would have of me," said God.
"Well, there is one thing," she said.
"Just name it," said God.
"It's those blond jokes. They are so demeaning to blondes everywhere, not just to me. I would like for blond jokes to stop."
"Consider it done," said God. "Blond jokes shall be stricken from the minds of humans.
But surely there is something that I could do just for you."
"There is one thing. But it's really small, and not worth your time," said the nun.
"Name it. Please," said God.
"It's the M&M's," said the nun. "They're so hard to peel!"
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| Posted by Ha N. Vu on 09-Aug-2005 | Why did the blonde hQ: Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back? A: From crawling across the street when the sign said "DON'T WALK".
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| Posted by Wicked_draven69 on 14-Aug-2005 | Big BreastsWhy do blondes have big breasts?
God had to put their brain somewhere.
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| Posted by Jon K. Hadley on 14-Aug-2005 | Blond Quiz!!If you awnser YES for any of the following you are a Dumb Blond.
1.Have you ever sent a fax with a stamp in ot?
2.Have you ever tripped over a cordless phone?
3.Have you ever put you star sighn at the bottom of an
application form where it says sighn here?
4.Ever spoken you mind and been totally speechless?
5.Moved because you heard 90% of crimes are commited around your
home?
6.Did you know you could listen to am radio at night?
7.Do you stare at frozen orange juice because it says
comcentrate?
8.Do you think taco bell is an mexican phone company?
9.Ever told some one t meet you at the corner of walkand dont
walk?
10.Seen a sighn that says airport left so turned around and went
home?
11.Put lip stick on your forehead so you sould make up your mind?
12.Have you ever studien for a blood test and failed?
13.Ever taken 2hours to watch 60 minutes?
14.Ever sent someone an email asking them if they had an email
account?
15.Ever sold you car so you could have gas money?
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| Posted by MiraJen on 13-Aug-2005 | Killing blondesQ: How do you kill a blonde?
A: Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool.
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| Posted by Daniel D. Cartwright on 14-Aug-2005 | Blonde Ice Hockey Team?What happened to the blonde Ice Hockey Team?
They drowned in Spring Training.
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| Posted by Gary E. Suter on 14-Aug-2005 | blonde on boardone day a blonde was apracticing for her drivers test with her
father. a cop pulls her over and says to her, looks at her
father and notices that he was as white as a ghost. he says " do
you realize that you were going 90 mph. in a 60 mph. zone?" the
blonde replies "no we just got off route 90.
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| Posted by Slim Caity on 14-Aug-2005 | Shortest BookWhat is the shortest book ever written?
"Thoughts of a Blond."
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| Posted by Scott p. Johnson on 14-Aug-2005 | The Blond and The IrishmanA blond and an Irish man are casully having a conversation when
the blond notices that the Irishman has a sticker on his left
foot with a "L" printed on it and a sticker on his right foot
with an "R" on it.
When inquiring about this the Irishman replies, "It's so I can
tell my left from my right"
After a few minutes silence the blond says, "Oooohhhh that's why
I have C & A printed in my knickers!"
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| Posted by Yummy P. Pants on 14-Aug-2005 | blondesA bolnde was walking down the street she sees a hot man she asks
him if he is with anybody he says "excuse me" and she says
certainly you should not do that in public and again he says
"excuse me" she says I know the properthing to say because my
father is bill clinton and he sayssss err ya ya should neever
farte in pulblica so I am a blonde am a havard student so the
man says I will give you a hundred bucks if you jump infront of
a bus the blonde having a problem with money says ok and jumps
infront of a bus and the guy gos over to her and sticks a
hundred bucks in her pocket and says heres 99 bucks for tying to
be a horr and hers a buck for trying to be a she
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| Posted by Thuh Viper on 14-Aug-2005 | dumb blondeA blonde walked into a bar.
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| Posted by iceqt M. Star on 14-Aug-2005 | How do can you......How can you tell someone is blonde?
when they look at you!
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| Posted by Danette J. Adkins on 14-Aug-2005 | Blonde on dutythere's this blonde,she works at a police station.{that right
there tells you something is bad}one day all the police men got
a stomach virus from a special cake that the blond
maked.So,later that day as her being the only one that could
actually go outside and fight bad guys,there was a criminal that
robbed a bank down the street.the people at the bank called in
and reported it ,then the chief told the blonde to go on duty
and try to catch the bad guys.so the blond had a choice,between
a rifle,a big big gun,and a bb gun,so as being a blonde,she
chose the bb gun,anyways,she got in her cop car and raced down
the street,she passed the bank up and went to the river bank,in
other words the park,but we say river bank.so she looked
around,and nothing seemed bad,so she keep looking.2 hours later
the cheif spots her on his lunch break down at the river bank,he
said to the blonde,"what are you doing?,the criminals got
away"she replied,"but you said to get on duty so I went to the
park and found some duty to get on,oh yeah,I think you need to
put more bb's in the gun too!"
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| Posted by Wedgey Boy on 14-Aug-2005 | what do u get when blondes r in a bubmereen?There are a lot of blonds in a submereen how do you drownd
them?knock on the door.
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| Posted by Nicole Calabrese on 14-Aug-2005 | The Blonde ArcherA blonde shot an arrow into the air and missed!
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| Posted by Jeff D. Ahern on 14-Aug-2005 | Blonde and the PoolA blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were in a swim race.
The blonde got to 3 quarters of the way to the end and then
decided she was reay tired so she swam all the way back to the
start.
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| Posted by Satin C on 09-Aug-2005 | Why do blondes giveQ: Why do blondes give such good blowjobs? A: Because that's what they train for all their lives.
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| Posted by Nicolas Lee on 09-Aug-2005 | Why did the deaf bloQ: Why did the deaf blonde sit on a newspaper? A: So she could lip read.
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| Posted by Robert B. Jay on 09-Aug-2005 | White-outWhy did the blonde use white-out on her computer screens?
She couldn't find their eraser.
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| Posted by Emily P. Giles on 12-Aug-2005 | Math ContestThere was a math contest and all of the audience were blondes. The contestant was brunette, but she was still stupid. The host say \"OK, its time for our 1st question. What is 5+2? \"Uhhhhhh....9?\" says the brunette. The audience says,\"GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE!!!\" \"OK, says the host, What is 3+3? \"Uhhhhhhhhhh...5? says the brunette. The audience says,\"GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE!\" \"ok\", says the host, \"this one is going to be easy. What is 1+1?\" \"Oh, that is easy! 2! says the brunette. Then the audience says, \"GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE!
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| Posted by Breanne M. Riley on 12-Aug-2005 | Blondes Really!!!!!There was a brunette, red head, and a blonde and they were going to swim across the English Channel using the breast stroke. It takes one day and one hour to swim across the channel. It took the brunette one day and one hour. It took the red head onr day and three hours. Three days later the blonde comes in and everyone asks her waht took her so long and she said i think the other two cheated because they used their arms!!!!!!
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| Posted by Howie Payne on 12-Aug-2005 | Short BlondesWhat does a blonde do when she wakes up?
Goes home.
How does a blonde turn on the light after having sex?
By opening the car door.
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| Posted by Michael Jackson jokes on 12-Aug-2005 | A blonde a brunette and a ginger.There was a blonde a brunette and a ginger stranded on an island with no food or water the only water there was,was the deep blue sea in front of them,after a week the ginger started to feel hungry and knowing the mainland was only 20 miles over the sea she decided to smim.So she swam and only managed to get 5 miles until she got eaten by a shark!
A week went on and the brunette started to feel alone even though the blonde was there she also felt very very thirsty and hungry so she decided to jump in and give it ago but only got 10 miles before she drowned and died.
So this leaves the blonde all alone on a stranded island with no food no water and nobody to talk to,so she thinks what have I got to lose its not as if anybody is counting on me so she jumps in the water she manged to get 15 MILES YES 15 MILES until she got tired and decided to swim back!!
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| Posted by Melanie04 on 13-Aug-2005 | HOW DOES A BLOND KILL A FISH.
How does a blond kill a fish.
The blond trys to dround the fish.
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| Posted by K S on 13-Aug-2005 | PotatosA blone, a brunette, and a red head, were running from the cops so they run into this barn they see three potato sacks sitting on the ground so they each jump in one. then the cops come running in to the barn after them, and they see the sacks sitting there so they hit the first one with their knight stick it was the brunette she said "woof" so they would think it was a dog. the cops hit the next one it was the redhead "meow" the cops thought it was a cat. the proceded to the third one it was the blnde and she yelled "potatos"
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