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| Posted by WestRunner on 14-Aug-2005 | Black Man and His ParrotA black man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The
bartender asks, "Hey, where did you get that from?"
The parrot replies, "There's thousands of 'em in Africa."
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| Posted by alison robichaux on 14-Aug-2005 | Big!What's 10 inches long and white?
Nothing. If it is ten inches long, it is black.
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| Posted by Karlina Fierling on 14-Aug-2005 | You Might be Ghetto if...If the rimms on your car cost more than your car...you might be
ghetto.
If "mybabyfavah" or "mybabymovah" is the name of your
significant other...you might be ghetto.
If you own more than one pair of gold shoes...you might be
ghetto.
If you have the gold lipstick to go with those gold shoes...you
might be ghetto.
If your daughter's name starts with a syallable rhyming with a
"la" or ends with "qua" or "ta"...you might be ghetto.
If your grandmother is under 40 years old...you might be ghetto.
If you have a brother or cousin named "stink", "man" or
"boo"...you might be ghetto.
If you find yourself in a physical confrontation because someone
stepped on your sneakers...you might be ghetto.
If your 4 yeard old can't talk, but can do the "tootsie
rool"...you might be ghetto.
If you constantly use *69 on your telephone and you say, "Did
you just call here?"...you might be ghetto.
If you name your child after a character on the Young and the
Restless...you might be ghetto.
If you do not have a job, but your hair and nails are done on a
weekly basis...you might be ghetto.
If you believe that the words mother and father have the letter
"v" in their spelling...you might be ghetto.
If "arts and crafts aids" (such as spray paint, glue, and
glitter) are hair products to you...you might be ghetto.
If the height of your hair is more than the height of your
head...you might be ghetto.
If the only skirt you own is a really a pair of denim shorts
with a flap across the front...you might be ghetto.
If you sleep in a chair at night to avoid messing up your
hair...you might be ghetto.
If you will only do it "doggystyle" with your mate to avoid
messing up your hair...you might be ghetto.
If you do not have your own place, do not have your own car, and
simply do not have your own anything, but your 2 year old has a
three-quarter lenght leather coat...you might be ghetto.
If the dentist-installed gold overlay in your mouth spells
words...you might be ghetto.
If you are a male and you have marks around your thighs from
your belt...you might be ghetto.
If you are male and your hair strongly resembles the bottom of a
bathing suit after sitting on the ledge of a concrete pool...you
might be ghetto.
If you are male and more than 3 girls page you, all using the
code 1...you might be ghetto.
If you son's name rhymes with "tirrell"...you might be ghetto.
If your flourescent pager mathches the weave in your
ponytail...you might be ghetto.
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| Posted by The Man on 14-Aug-2005 | M&M PenisA black guy, a white guy, and a Mexican all want to go out with
this girl. The guys find out the the girls dad is the devil, so
they ask him what they should do to be worthy of going out with
his daughter.
The devil tells them all to take down their pants, so they do.
The devil goes up to the white man and grabs his penis. The
penis immidiatley melts and the guy runs away yelling.
The devil goes up to the Mexican man and grabs his penis. And
like the other guys, it melts and he runs away yelling.
The devil now walks up to the black man and grabs his penis.
Nothing happens. The devil looks up at the man in bewilderment.
The black man replies, "Melts in your mouth, not in you hands!"
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| Posted by Reflex449 on 14-Aug-2005 | Black Or White God?There was a black guy and a white guy. They were debating over
whether god was white or black. The white guy said that there
was only one way to find out and that is to pray. So they go up
on a hill and they pray, and pray, and pray. Finally they here a
voice say, "I am what I am." The white guy jumps up, and says,
"AHA I told you he was white." The black guy jumps up and says,
"What do you mean? That didn't prove anything." "Yes it did,
Because if he was black he would've said I is what I is."
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| Posted by Dave Heazlewood on 14-Aug-2005 | emotions partya man had just mooved into a niaborhood and he thought he would
have an emotions party to get to know people in the area
any way on the night of the party there was a man all in green
dresed as envy and a man in a heart dressed as love then there
was a nock at the door and there was 2 black people standing
there completely naked apart fom 1 had a pear infront of hid
dick and the other had a jug of custard withhis dick in it
so the man who was hosting the party said this is an emotion
party not a nude club
so the first black man said "we are emotions hes fuckin dis
custard and im deep in dis pear!"
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| Posted by D. Eliasoff on 14-Aug-2005 | Who Was This Jesus Dude Anyway?Three good points that Jesus was Mexican:
1. His first name was Jesus.
2. He was bilingual.
3. He was always being harassed by the authorities.
But there were equally good arguments that Jesus was black:
1. He called everybody "brother."
2. He liked Gospel.
3. He couldn't get a fair trial.
But there were equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:
1. He went into His Father's business.
2. He lived at home until he was 33.
3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his Mother was sure
he was God.
But then there were equally good arguments that Jesus was
Italian:
1. He talked with his hands.
2. He had wine with every meal.
3. He used olive oil.
But then there were equally good arguments that Jesus was a
Californian:
1. He never cut his hair.
2. He walked around barefoot.
3. He started a new religion.
But then there were equally good arguments that Jesus was Irish
1. He never got married.
2. He was always telling stories.
3. He loved green pastures.
But perhaps the most compelling evidence is that Jesus was a
woman:
1. He had to feed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was no
food.
2. He kept trying to get the message across to a bunch of men
who JUST DIDN'T GET IT.
3. Even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was
more work for him to do.
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| Posted by Emily M on 14-Aug-2005 | mountainsQ. what do you call three white people running down a mountain
A. avalach
Q.what do you call three black people running down a mountain
A. mud slide
Q.what do you call three mexicans running down a mountain
A. Jail break
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| Posted by Pedro Fonseca on 14-Aug-2005 | Crash n' BurnOne day a Black guy that was trying to steal a bank, dies in a
shootput with the cops. So when he goes up to heaven, he's
waiting in line to tell St.Peter his name, so finally he gets up
there, and St. Peter asks him "Your name, kind sir," and the
black guy says "Leonardo DiCaprio." St.Peter confused says, "ok
hold on a sec." And he goes to his office, picks up the phone
and calls God. When god picks up the phone, St.Peter says "God,
did the Titanic sink or burn?"
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| Posted by Lady Joker1975 on 14-Aug-2005 | Only For a Chocolate BiscuitThere was a man who was heading away for a week on business. His
wife was incredibly horny and needed a good fuck every now and
again so she was left with a warning from her husband before he
left. He said, "If I find out that you have been shagging
another man while I'm gone then I will pull every pubic hair
from your crotch!"
He was dead serious but his wife thought she could occupy
herself for just one week using her fingers and the handle of
her tennis racquet (which she did a lot when her husband was
gone).
However she failed and one day before her husband was set to
return she was gagging for more than she could get from her
fingers and the tennis racquet! So she headed into town in the
hope of finding a large well-bodied fuckable man to satisfy her
lust. While walking down the High Street she found a very hunky
and sexy black man that she wouldn't mind screwing and so she
walked up to him and said-"Will you come home with?" and the
black man replied, "Only for a chocolate biscuit." She gave him
a biscuit and they headed towards her house.
So they got home and the woman said, "Will you come inside and
upstairs?"
"Only for a chocolate biscuit" So she gave him another biscuit.
So they got upstairs and into the woman's bedroom. "Will you
take off your clothes and lie with me on the bed?"
"Only for a chocolate biscuit" So she gave him yet another
biscuit!!
"Will you fuck me until I hit orgasm at least three times!"
"Only for a chocolate biscuit" So she gave him a biscuit leaving
only one left in the box and they got to business.
He was drilling into her-fucking her harder and faster until she
was dripping wet-screwing her pussy and hitting her G-spot with
every hard core thrust. She was at her orgasmic peak and when it
was over they were both swollen and sore and so exhausted that
they fell asleep together in the bed.
The next mourning the husband arrived home from his trip and
headed upstairs to great his wife with a homecoming ride. She
heard him coming upstairs and immediately told the black to get
into the cupboard and hide. "Only for a chocolate biscuit" he
said and so she gave him the last chocolate biscuit and shoved
him into the cupboard just before her husband walked in.
He walked towards the bed and began to take off his clothes when
he stopped and spotted the white spunk stains on the lilac
sheets.
"You've been in bed with another man and don't lie to me!!!!!!!"
His wife didn't say a word and like he had warned he opened her
legs and began to pluck all her pubic hairs from her crotch one
by one. By the time he reached the last one he couldn't get it
to come out and so he shouted, "Come out you black bastard!!!"
And the guy in the cupboard shouted "Only for a chocolate
biscuit!!!!!!"
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